I want to be in love again. I want the "can't sleep, can't eat, and can't think" kind of love. I want a good distraction. I need an inspiration.
Lately, I have been super stressed from work and managing the business. I am starting to handling various accounts at work and I am beginning to experience the birth pains of a business. It can be overwhelming. I guess now I am starting to realize that I am the type of person who can handle it all when I have that special someone who can help ease the stress. I get depressed when I fail to manage it. I know right. There is something seriously wrong with me.
To combat this downward spiral, I have decided to go on a quick escape out of town. I thought a change of scenery would help. It did. But I yearn for something more. I guess what I am trying to say is I want someone to share with my success.
Waiter, pafollow up nga ng order kong love life. Thanks.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Monday, October 11, 2010
Rules
When I really like someone, I tend to break some rules and forget about the game. Sometimes it pays off. Sometimes it does not. If it does not pay off then at least I know I will not have regrets. The beginnings of a relationship for me is like driving a car at 140 kph. I just have to remember to wear my seatbelt.
Yes, I am back and at my best.
Yes, I am back and at my best.
Monday, September 20, 2010
Productivity
I am an excellent multi-tasker. I get so many things done at the same time. I am also a fast worker. Part of the reason why is that I am also very decisive. I do not mean to toot my own horn but I am just really proud of the things I have accomplished the past few months!
I am graduating! No. Not from college as I have done that 4 years ago. Sometime in August 2009, I was accepted into a management trainee program of a development bank. Out of more than a thousand applicants all over the country, I was 1 of 40 chosen to undergo a year long training in various banking activities - economics, finance, accounting, treasury, trust, development banking, retail lending, etc. Needless to say it was a very intensive training program full of exams, reports, presentations, and on-the-job training. Unfortunately, there were people who did not make it to the end. But fortunately, I did! So yay! Now deployment seems to be the next concern. As with any management trainee program in any industry, your department assignment after is what really counts. I hope the powers that be and the universe will conspire in my favor. I believe it.
My spa business is opening this Sunday! Yes, I am officially an entrepreneur. Sometime in May, I decided to put up a business. I thought of the 3 things I loved most - travel, food, and being pampered. So the most logical thing for me to do is to put up my own spa since setting up a travel agency and a restaurant would need my 24/7 attention. A small spa would be the most feasible business project given my day job. I searched for a good franchise since coming up with own concept at this time would be too arduous. So that's how it started. So the next 3 months were spent planning, meeting with my franchisor, organizing my finances, looking for the perfect location, hiring staff, coordinating with my interior designer, directing the contractor, managing staff training, buying supplies, etc. You know the drill. Looking back, I can not believe I was able to do all those things with all the other events happening in my personal and professional life. So ladies and gentlemen or the select few of you who follow this tiny little blog, The NailXperts Spa: Nail Salon and Body Spa BF Resort Village Las Piñas Branch will have its grand opening this Sunday, September 26, 2010!
The family front seems to be going well too. I mean there are still some issues within the family that have yet to be resolved. But I am confident that the Lord and the law will side with the truth. The truth fortunately is on our side. So to you, my mother's future ex-husband and our estranged loser of a father, beware. Payback is imminent.
Meanwhile, my love life has hit a temporary glitch. Yes, we recently broke up. Ok, maybe not too recently. But it's just now that I have finally admitted and wrote about it. I guess it is true what they say. When your career starts to take off, your personal life suffers. When can I have it all? Because I really do believe I can have it all! Screw that old saying.
So there. I hope and pray that the next few months would be even better. Cha-ching!
I am graduating! No. Not from college as I have done that 4 years ago. Sometime in August 2009, I was accepted into a management trainee program of a development bank. Out of more than a thousand applicants all over the country, I was 1 of 40 chosen to undergo a year long training in various banking activities - economics, finance, accounting, treasury, trust, development banking, retail lending, etc. Needless to say it was a very intensive training program full of exams, reports, presentations, and on-the-job training. Unfortunately, there were people who did not make it to the end. But fortunately, I did! So yay! Now deployment seems to be the next concern. As with any management trainee program in any industry, your department assignment after is what really counts. I hope the powers that be and the universe will conspire in my favor. I believe it.
My spa business is opening this Sunday! Yes, I am officially an entrepreneur. Sometime in May, I decided to put up a business. I thought of the 3 things I loved most - travel, food, and being pampered. So the most logical thing for me to do is to put up my own spa since setting up a travel agency and a restaurant would need my 24/7 attention. A small spa would be the most feasible business project given my day job. I searched for a good franchise since coming up with own concept at this time would be too arduous. So that's how it started. So the next 3 months were spent planning, meeting with my franchisor, organizing my finances, looking for the perfect location, hiring staff, coordinating with my interior designer, directing the contractor, managing staff training, buying supplies, etc. You know the drill. Looking back, I can not believe I was able to do all those things with all the other events happening in my personal and professional life. So ladies and gentlemen or the select few of you who follow this tiny little blog, The NailXperts Spa: Nail Salon and Body Spa BF Resort Village Las Piñas Branch will have its grand opening this Sunday, September 26, 2010!
The family front seems to be going well too. I mean there are still some issues within the family that have yet to be resolved. But I am confident that the Lord and the law will side with the truth. The truth fortunately is on our side. So to you, my mother's future ex-husband and our estranged loser of a father, beware. Payback is imminent.
Meanwhile, my love life has hit a temporary glitch. Yes, we recently broke up. Ok, maybe not too recently. But it's just now that I have finally admitted and wrote about it. I guess it is true what they say. When your career starts to take off, your personal life suffers. When can I have it all? Because I really do believe I can have it all! Screw that old saying.
So there. I hope and pray that the next few months would be even better. Cha-ching!
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
My Ultimate Dream
When people ask me what my dream is or where I see myself 5, 10, or 20 years from now, I would normally answer something related to being young, rich, and successful. That is true. I do want to remain young or at least look young for a very long time, have loads of money, and be a very relevant force in my field. I also have goals of having my own foundation geared towards the alleviation of poverty or some other worthy cause befitting a beauty pageant winner. I dream of love like anyone else. I want someone to be a witness to my existence. Those are goals worth pursuing.
But really, my ultimate dream is to take some time off from my life and just wander the world. I want to travel. I want to leave everything I have behind for a year and just have the most life-changing and character-building experiences I could ever have. Life is too short and to see the world from a whole new perspective would be something worth aspiring for. I want to be a backpacker with no plan whatsoever of where to go next. I will sustain myself by getting a job I could never really do as myself in my own world. I could be a janitor in some obscure village in Chile. I could be a bartender in a little known town in Spain. I could be a simple farmer's helper in Mongolia. Anything goes.
But then reality check. I hold an effing Philippine passport. I can not have my life-changing and character-building experience if I have to worry about getting denied entry because my country is not wealthy nor powerful enough! Crap. No wonder it is those caucasians from Europe and North America who can get lost in Asia or South America and have those experiences.
Ugh. I want to be European in my next life. Wait. Make that Western European.
But really, my ultimate dream is to take some time off from my life and just wander the world. I want to travel. I want to leave everything I have behind for a year and just have the most life-changing and character-building experiences I could ever have. Life is too short and to see the world from a whole new perspective would be something worth aspiring for. I want to be a backpacker with no plan whatsoever of where to go next. I will sustain myself by getting a job I could never really do as myself in my own world. I could be a janitor in some obscure village in Chile. I could be a bartender in a little known town in Spain. I could be a simple farmer's helper in Mongolia. Anything goes.
But then reality check. I hold an effing Philippine passport. I can not have my life-changing and character-building experience if I have to worry about getting denied entry because my country is not wealthy nor powerful enough! Crap. No wonder it is those caucasians from Europe and North America who can get lost in Asia or South America and have those experiences.
Ugh. I want to be European in my next life. Wait. Make that Western European.
Hongkong Holiday
News do tend to sensationalize. Yeah, I was a bit worried about going ahead with my planned trip to Hongkong with one of my best friends. All this talk about a backlash against Filipinos was indeed a cause for concern. But seriously, no untoward incident occured while I was there. I expected to be at the receiving end of some disrespectful behavior from a local, but I was treated like a valued tourist instead. Isn't that great?
They served good food. They assisted me while I shopped. They politely answered when I asked for directions. All the things my mom said could happen, didn't. So that was great.
Meanwhile, I did encounter some Filipinos there and I must say that if I were one of the locals, I may be annoyed by Filipinos too. Some Filipinos can be just so loud and inappropriate. Some domestic helpers would make latag their banig in the middle of a business park and make tambay there all day. Businessmen clad in their suits would pass by and understandably glare at them. Some Filipino tourists would shop like they are the only ones there. They would converse loudly in a language people around them do not understand. Even I was really irritated with all the banter. I was already inside the fitting room and I can hear one of them shouting at her companion on the other side of the store, "nakahanap ka ng size?!?". I felt like someone has invaded my personal space.
Now I do not mean to generalize. Hence, I said some Filipinos - not all. But I guess you could say that this can be true for all other nationalities. Some Indonesians can be like that too. Some Malaysians can be that way as well. Some Indians can just be the same. But so far, I have not encountered such. Admit it or not, it is usually the Filipinos creating so much raucous.
They served good food. They assisted me while I shopped. They politely answered when I asked for directions. All the things my mom said could happen, didn't. So that was great.
Meanwhile, I did encounter some Filipinos there and I must say that if I were one of the locals, I may be annoyed by Filipinos too. Some Filipinos can be just so loud and inappropriate. Some domestic helpers would make latag their banig in the middle of a business park and make tambay there all day. Businessmen clad in their suits would pass by and understandably glare at them. Some Filipino tourists would shop like they are the only ones there. They would converse loudly in a language people around them do not understand. Even I was really irritated with all the banter. I was already inside the fitting room and I can hear one of them shouting at her companion on the other side of the store, "nakahanap ka ng size?!?". I felt like someone has invaded my personal space.
Now I do not mean to generalize. Hence, I said some Filipinos - not all. But I guess you could say that this can be true for all other nationalities. Some Indonesians can be like that too. Some Malaysians can be that way as well. Some Indians can just be the same. But so far, I have not encountered such. Admit it or not, it is usually the Filipinos creating so much raucous.
Monday, August 23, 2010
Love Language
My love language is quality time. That is how I show love and affection and that is how I feel most loved in return. His is words of affirmation. That is how he shows his love and affection and that is how he feels most loved in return.
I guess that is why we are at this sad and frustrating state in our relationship. It will not be a big surprise if one of us starts looking for happiness with someone else.
I guess that is why we are at this sad and frustrating state in our relationship. It will not be a big surprise if one of us starts looking for happiness with someone else.
Monday, August 16, 2010
Queer as Folk
I guess I am little late with the sentiment seeing that this series ended 5 years ago but I have to say I can not remember the last time I was moved and affected by a TV series like Queer as Folk. I got so involved with the characters, plot, and the issues raised about the gay community. The way they tackled them were so realistically fierce. All the issues about the gay and lesbian community were tackled head-on without apologies and without judgement. Name it and it was there - sex, drugs, aids, discrimination, hate crimes, marriage, adoption, civil liberties, etc. I was able to identify with all the characters at some level and it was such a joy to watch. Yeah, ok so I cried in some scenes too. But I swear you would to if you get to watch this religiously.
Ofcourse once I finished, I had to research about the show even more. I found tribute sites, tribute shows, and more about the actors who played the characters in the series who surprisingly were mostly straight! I also found out that almost half of the viewers of this show were straight women. Amazing! So what can I say? I admonish you to buy they dvd box set of Queer as Folk. Or I will be happy to lend it to you under one condition - that you promise to watch it from the pilot episode to the series finale. It would only be a waste not to.
So I shall leave you with some of my favorite quotes from the show.
Brian: [to Craig Taylor, Justin's dad] So in other words, for Justin to live here with you, he has to deny who he is... what he thinks... and how he feels. Well, that's not love. That's hate.
Brian: You stupid little twat, never let anyone fuck you without a condom.
Justin: You're not just anyone.
Brian: Yeah, I'm sure that's what Ben thought about the guy who infected him. Put it on me... I want you safe. I want you around for a long time.
Brian: We're queer. We don't need marriage. We don't need the sanction of dickless politicians and pederast priests. We fuck who we want to, when we want to. That is our God-given right.
Michael: But it is also our God-given right to have everything that straight people have. Because we're every bit as much human as they are.
[Ted's trying to get Brian to talk about losing both Michael and Justin]
Ted: You can't fool me. You gotta free yourself of this burden. Release it. Let it all hang out.
Brian: My mother was a frigid bitch. My father was an abusive drunk. They had a hateful marriage, which is probably why I am unwilling or unable to form a committed long-term relationship of my own. The fact that I drink like a fish, abuse drugs, and have more or less redefined promiscuity doesn't help, much. As a result, I've lost the two people in my life that mean most to me.
Melanie: I used to hate it when Brian would say, "There are two kinds of straight people in this world - the ones who hate you to your face, and the ones who hate you behind your back," because I knew that wasn't true, there are plenty of straight people who don't hate us. But the ones who do no longer have to do it behind our backs, they can do it in the White House, in the churches, on television, in the streets! Is that the kinda place we wanna live? Is that the kinda place we wanna raise our kids?
Brian: Remember what I said to you last night?
Justin: Yes, I heard. You said you love me.
Brian: Then how about marrying me?
[giving his speech at the Committee for Human Rights]
Michael: It's an honor to stand here today, considering a few weeks ago the doctors weren't sure I was going to make it. But I was one of the lucky ones. I'm here. And as terrifying as it was, I'd be there again to defeat a bill that would deny rights to Americans just because they're gay. I have a loving partner, two wonderful kids, a home, a small business. The truth is, I'm just like you.
[puts away prepared speech and speaks from the heart]
Michael: Actually, that's not the truth. Sure, in a lot of ways, I am just like you. I wanna be happy, I want some security, a little extra money in my pocket, but in many ways, my life is nothing like yours. Why should it be? Do we all have to have the same lives to have the same rights? I thought that diversity was what this country was all about. In the gay community, we have drag queens, leather daddies, trannies, and couples with children - every color of the rainbow. My mother's standing way in the back with some friends. My friends. She once told me that people are like snowflakes; every one special and unique... and in the morning you have to shovel 'em off the driveway. But being different is what makes us all the same. It's what makes us family.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Success, Like Happiness, is a Choice
I am so eager to get the ball rolling! I have decided to become an entreprenuer. I am in the process of setting up a franchise of a health and wellness business and I am so excited!
It is very challenging but it so much fun! Business registrations are in process. Designs are being created. Applicants are being interviewed. I can not wait to sign, approve, and hire!
I hope my enthusiasm will continue moving forward.
Meanwhile, I have also decided to be the hottest version of myself by November. I already hired a personal trainer to assist me in the gym and watch my diet. So far so good. I have lost 5 lbs! But I need to lose more. I need to lose a total of 23 lbs. And hopefully I would have already lost 10 lbs. by the end of the month as I have plans of meeting up with a friend abroad. Must be at my best.
I hope my determination will be steadfast.
My love life has been a bit wanting lately. Ali and I have certain challenges we need to overcome. It is very possible that he will be based abroad for work and though I completely understand, it makes me feel frustrated. Until then, he is very busy juggling 2 jobs which makes our time together more scarce. I waited far too long for love to come into my life and now it is in danger of ending too soon. I hope I am wrong. I mean we have only been going out for about 4 months. I can not believe I am saying this, but maybe I need someone who can give me the time I deserve.
I hope my patience will be stretched.
I have decided to be successful. I hope this will apply to all facets of my life.
It is very challenging but it so much fun! Business registrations are in process. Designs are being created. Applicants are being interviewed. I can not wait to sign, approve, and hire!
I hope my enthusiasm will continue moving forward.
Meanwhile, I have also decided to be the hottest version of myself by November. I already hired a personal trainer to assist me in the gym and watch my diet. So far so good. I have lost 5 lbs! But I need to lose more. I need to lose a total of 23 lbs. And hopefully I would have already lost 10 lbs. by the end of the month as I have plans of meeting up with a friend abroad. Must be at my best.
I hope my determination will be steadfast.
My love life has been a bit wanting lately. Ali and I have certain challenges we need to overcome. It is very possible that he will be based abroad for work and though I completely understand, it makes me feel frustrated. Until then, he is very busy juggling 2 jobs which makes our time together more scarce. I waited far too long for love to come into my life and now it is in danger of ending too soon. I hope I am wrong. I mean we have only been going out for about 4 months. I can not believe I am saying this, but maybe I need someone who can give me the time I deserve.
I hope my patience will be stretched.
I have decided to be successful. I hope this will apply to all facets of my life.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Wardrobe Overhaul
I have decided to have a wardrobe makeover. I think it would be good for me to have new clothes to wear in the next month or so. A new wardrobe for me signals a fresh start. I usually do some major shopping when there are significant changes in my life - positive or negative. Being that the management program I am currently in is about to end and new career challenges are about to reveal themselves, I think it is time to shop anew. So here are the pieces that inspire me. My fashion sense has always been casual preppy but I like to mix it up every now and then. The cut and fit of the garment is key.
The suit: Every man should have at least one. Tailored suits are always better than off the rack. But if you must do off the rack, then pick one that makes your shoulders broader, and your waist slimmer. Slim trousers are in. Baggy is out. 2-button suits is the most modern yet classic at the same time.
The sunglasses: I am partial to Ray-Ban classic aviators. I do not even care if my sister said the style does not suit my face. But I am open to change in that department. To be honest, I have yet to determine which shape of sunglasses look best on me.
Trousers: Slim, Straight, and Flat-front. 'Nough said.
Flip-Flops: I am in love with these Lacoste Tirage Flip-flops.
Shorts: I am kinda over the plaid shorts. Slim and tailored are the buzz words for shorts in 2010. I wear them a little bit above the knee.
Cardigan: I rarely wear them simply because of the climate but I just love these ones from Shades of Greige
The Perfect White shirt: Every man should have a perfect-fitting white shirt. Flexible and classic. These are sculptees - a new breed of men's undergarment designed to accentuate the pecs and make the waist look slimmer. It does for men what spanks do for women. Must have one.
Running shoes: I recently bought these pair of red running shoes from Adidas. Don't you just love it? Like really love it? Because I love it!
Anyway, that's it for now. I have to build my corporate wardrobe and weekend ensembles for day and night.
The suit: Every man should have at least one. Tailored suits are always better than off the rack. But if you must do off the rack, then pick one that makes your shoulders broader, and your waist slimmer. Slim trousers are in. Baggy is out. 2-button suits is the most modern yet classic at the same time.
The sunglasses: I am partial to Ray-Ban classic aviators. I do not even care if my sister said the style does not suit my face. But I am open to change in that department. To be honest, I have yet to determine which shape of sunglasses look best on me.
Trousers: Slim, Straight, and Flat-front. 'Nough said.
Flip-Flops: I am in love with these Lacoste Tirage Flip-flops.
Shorts: I am kinda over the plaid shorts. Slim and tailored are the buzz words for shorts in 2010. I wear them a little bit above the knee.
Cardigan: I rarely wear them simply because of the climate but I just love these ones from Shades of Greige
The Perfect White shirt: Every man should have a perfect-fitting white shirt. Flexible and classic. These are sculptees - a new breed of men's undergarment designed to accentuate the pecs and make the waist look slimmer. It does for men what spanks do for women. Must have one.
Running shoes: I recently bought these pair of red running shoes from Adidas. Don't you just love it? Like really love it? Because I love it!
Anyway, that's it for now. I have to build my corporate wardrobe and weekend ensembles for day and night.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Promising Prospects
The past couple of months have been a blessing. Life is good.
Though experiencing some possibly major setbacks, my family is still intact and ready to face the challenge of a lawsuit head on. My pathetic excuse of a father has decided to file a civil case against me and my siblings over a property that my grandfather had legally donated to us. I guess when you are over 60 and have nothing to show for, you turn desperate. My siblings and I have talked it out and our message is clear - sige, mag-ubusan tayo ng yaman. bring it on!
I can slowly sense my career taking off. I believe it! The management associates program I am currently in is about to end and I am anxious and excited to find out my permanent assignment. It is no secret that I am targetting a head office position in any of the following departments - trust services, treasury, and fund sourcing. My assignment would help me decide on my next career moves. If satisfied, then I shall invest in other cv-building initiatives like enrollment in a foreign language course for example. If dissatisfied, then I guess exit strategies must be implemented.
My love life is still looking up. We are still on our honeymoon stage when almost everything is peachy. I do see some red flags. There are still some important issues we need to work on and there are certain things I still need to accept. But overall, I can honestly say I am happy. But I guess happiness is different from contentment. It makes me wonder if I am the monogamous type. I have proven to myself that I can make a commitment with another person I love but I have yet to prove to myself if I can be faithful. I have always believed that you can not find everything you need and want in 1 person. That thing they say where you find someone who can fill the voids in your life - that other half or that better half - well I think it is mostly bullshit. I do not think that person really exists. You may find someone who can make you happy and inspire you to be a better person, but that person can not propel you to greater heights in all the mountains you wish to climb. Do I even make sense? Meanwhile, I have started to watch an old series called Queer as Folk and the aggressive, good-looking, and permiscuous character named Brian said something that somehow resonated with me. "I do not believe in relationships. I believe in fucking. It is direct, honest, and efficient. It does not have the complications of a relationship brought about by so-called love which in most cases is founded on lies and half-truths." It got me thinking.
Although I may entertain some questionable thoughts on relationships, I can still say I am relatively content. Hmmmm...or maybe not. I guess it is human nature to want more things and strive for better things in life. I guess when all the basic facets of my life make the grade, it is but natural for me to aspire for other things that can give me a stronger sense of fulfillment. Hence, I have been thinking about going into business. I have some options. I can franchise or start my own. But right now I am thinking that I can franchise to start then find something I am really passionate about and I feel like I can excel in and build my own business from it. The opportunities look bright.
Now I wonder how the next few months would shape up. The prospects are promising.
Though experiencing some possibly major setbacks, my family is still intact and ready to face the challenge of a lawsuit head on. My pathetic excuse of a father has decided to file a civil case against me and my siblings over a property that my grandfather had legally donated to us. I guess when you are over 60 and have nothing to show for, you turn desperate. My siblings and I have talked it out and our message is clear - sige, mag-ubusan tayo ng yaman. bring it on!
I can slowly sense my career taking off. I believe it! The management associates program I am currently in is about to end and I am anxious and excited to find out my permanent assignment. It is no secret that I am targetting a head office position in any of the following departments - trust services, treasury, and fund sourcing. My assignment would help me decide on my next career moves. If satisfied, then I shall invest in other cv-building initiatives like enrollment in a foreign language course for example. If dissatisfied, then I guess exit strategies must be implemented.
My love life is still looking up. We are still on our honeymoon stage when almost everything is peachy. I do see some red flags. There are still some important issues we need to work on and there are certain things I still need to accept. But overall, I can honestly say I am happy. But I guess happiness is different from contentment. It makes me wonder if I am the monogamous type. I have proven to myself that I can make a commitment with another person I love but I have yet to prove to myself if I can be faithful. I have always believed that you can not find everything you need and want in 1 person. That thing they say where you find someone who can fill the voids in your life - that other half or that better half - well I think it is mostly bullshit. I do not think that person really exists. You may find someone who can make you happy and inspire you to be a better person, but that person can not propel you to greater heights in all the mountains you wish to climb. Do I even make sense? Meanwhile, I have started to watch an old series called Queer as Folk and the aggressive, good-looking, and permiscuous character named Brian said something that somehow resonated with me. "I do not believe in relationships. I believe in fucking. It is direct, honest, and efficient. It does not have the complications of a relationship brought about by so-called love which in most cases is founded on lies and half-truths." It got me thinking.
Although I may entertain some questionable thoughts on relationships, I can still say I am relatively content. Hmmmm...or maybe not. I guess it is human nature to want more things and strive for better things in life. I guess when all the basic facets of my life make the grade, it is but natural for me to aspire for other things that can give me a stronger sense of fulfillment. Hence, I have been thinking about going into business. I have some options. I can franchise or start my own. But right now I am thinking that I can franchise to start then find something I am really passionate about and I feel like I can excel in and build my own business from it. The opportunities look bright.
Now I wonder how the next few months would shape up. The prospects are promising.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Grumpy Old Man
I can totally understand why he has a big chip on his shoulder and a huge stick up his ass. I mean look at him. He is a lackluster, balding, and middle-aged man who is still rank and file and forced to "babysit" a bunch of talented, and mostly fresh-out-of-college management trainees who will most definitely outrank him in less than 3 months.
So let him have his little power trip. It won't last. His day will certainly come. Now what would Rubi do? (Insert kontrabida-ish laugh here)
So let him have his little power trip. It won't last. His day will certainly come. Now what would Rubi do? (Insert kontrabida-ish laugh here)
Monday, May 31, 2010
Congress is Inefficient
I do not understand why it is taking so long to proclaim a new president and vice president. The entire nation practically knows who won the recently concluded elections. Only the "blessing" from congress is missing. It seems to me that the incumbent losers are delaying the canvassing for as long as they can. I mean seriously. Why would these losers ask Comelec to stop releasing updates? What good will come out of it? Isn't it better to be transparent to the Filipino people?
When the United States held their elections in 2008, the people knew the results in a matter of hours even without 100% of the votes counted. Because of the automated system, scientific exit polls, and fast media outlets, they were able to project a Barack Obama win. For awhile I thought we were headed in the same direction but then our brilliant lawyers and solons had to delay things for reasons I can not seem to fathom.
The elections were a relative success. The foreign observers noted it. Majority of the nation believed it. The exit polls confirmed it. Now to those in disbelief, deal with it.
When the United States held their elections in 2008, the people knew the results in a matter of hours even without 100% of the votes counted. Because of the automated system, scientific exit polls, and fast media outlets, they were able to project a Barack Obama win. For awhile I thought we were headed in the same direction but then our brilliant lawyers and solons had to delay things for reasons I can not seem to fathom.
The elections were a relative success. The foreign observers noted it. Majority of the nation believed it. The exit polls confirmed it. Now to those in disbelief, deal with it.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Losing Focus
I have to admit that the recent progress in the love department has made me lose focus at work. It does not seem to be as important anymore. That can not be. I have to motivate myself once again. I believe that I will finish this program and I will be assigned in my desired department. I miss my friends at work too. I know this sounds crazy but I feel like I am losing my grip on them. I see them everyday but I feel like something has changed. Maybe an ultimate bonding session should be the next agenda.
Speaking of love, my best friend recently got engaged! And I am so happy for her. It was somehow expected but the way it was announced was one for the books. The father of the soon to be bride made the announcement and everyone was in tears. Words can not fully capture the moment so I hesitate to make a vivid description. I shall be a bridesman. Yes, a bridesman. I am quite excited as I have never been part of an entourage before.
Meanwhile the elections are over and I just hope that the winning candidates do the country good. I am fully supportive of the government. I hope Noynoy succeeds. His success means the entire nation's success. So I am crossing my fingers. Unfortunately, the LGBT community has to wait another 3 years to be represented in congress. Ang Ladlad did well but not well enough to garner a seat. Oh well. The mere fact that it was on the ballot for the first time is victory enough. Change maybe gradual but change will surely come.
Speaking of love, my best friend recently got engaged! And I am so happy for her. It was somehow expected but the way it was announced was one for the books. The father of the soon to be bride made the announcement and everyone was in tears. Words can not fully capture the moment so I hesitate to make a vivid description. I shall be a bridesman. Yes, a bridesman. I am quite excited as I have never been part of an entourage before.
Meanwhile the elections are over and I just hope that the winning candidates do the country good. I am fully supportive of the government. I hope Noynoy succeeds. His success means the entire nation's success. So I am crossing my fingers. Unfortunately, the LGBT community has to wait another 3 years to be represented in congress. Ang Ladlad did well but not well enough to garner a seat. Oh well. The mere fact that it was on the ballot for the first time is victory enough. Change maybe gradual but change will surely come.
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Too Long
This management program I am currently in is starting to get old. It feels so long already. Maybe it is just the module right now. Perhaps it is some people whom you have grown tired of seeing almost everyday. It could be the annoying facilitators. In any case, I am so over it. The work we do is make believe at best. If it were not for the friendships I have built within my office circle, I would simply refuse to get up from bed. I love my bed. Why I get up at 6 am everyday to head to an office situated in Commonwealth is beyond me. Can we fast forward to August and make us officers already?!? Naman!
I have been single for almost 6 years now. Yes, 6 years. It has been too long. During that time there have been some significant relationships but none of them escalated to an actual commitment. It is always almost but not quite. My love life is about a series of relationships that ended before it began. Sucks to be me I know. But this time, I feel like the drought is about to end. I am starting to get scared actually. I am so happy that it is frightening. What if it will turn out the way it did before? You open yourself up to someone and they end up just dropping you without warning. You fight for someone so hard and in the end they just leave with so many friendships broken. You lay your cards on the table yet all they do is play games. Nakakapagod. Now that another prospective relationship is in the works, I can only hope that it will turn out to be pure and true. All I really want is to be loved.
The long wait is almost over. We are about to elect a new set of leaders that will shape the future of our country. I can only hope that people will vote for those "ought to be elected" and not those "most likely to be elected". Survey are supposed to follow us and not the other way around. For this election, I have decided to make the principled and intelligent choice. Noynoy is out simply because he has not earned anything for himself. He has not done anything of significance at all. If he wins, then we are so screwed and we can not even do anything about it because we can not impeach a president for incompetence. And are we not taught and brought up to be better than our parents? For this reason alone, I can not cast my vote for Noynoy, who has history of mental problems. Yes. I said it. Naniniwala ako sa report na kahit sabihin pa natin ay peke, walang duda sakin na may hindi normal kay Noynoy. Erap is not even a choice because he is simply embarrassing. He is a convicted plunderer yet he is allowed to run for the same office where he amassed his wealth. Grabe. Only in the Philippines. I have narrowed down my choices between Villar and Gibo. I thought I have decided on Gibo but after seeing Villar's hot seat interview on Bandila a few hours ago, it made me rethink my decision. I saw his experience, competence, and sincerity. I realized that a lot of the criticisms and black propaganda against him are rooted on crab mentality. Ang mga pinoy kasi pilit binababa ang mga taong naiangat ang sarili. So I would not mind if Villar wins the presidency. Imagine what he could do if succeeds in running the government like a private institution. Hello efficiency! Then ofcourse, there is Gibo. Gibo is simply stellar. If he becomes president, I would be so proud. I truly believe that he can unite this country. He has the ability to make people of different backgrounds, beliefs, and ideologies meet somewhere in the middle to arrive at a consensus. He is young and dynamic. He has good judgement and even-tempered. He knows the issues plaguing this country well. I may just cast my vote for him.
Too long is this blog now. I must end it right here.
I have been single for almost 6 years now. Yes, 6 years. It has been too long. During that time there have been some significant relationships but none of them escalated to an actual commitment. It is always almost but not quite. My love life is about a series of relationships that ended before it began. Sucks to be me I know. But this time, I feel like the drought is about to end. I am starting to get scared actually. I am so happy that it is frightening. What if it will turn out the way it did before? You open yourself up to someone and they end up just dropping you without warning. You fight for someone so hard and in the end they just leave with so many friendships broken. You lay your cards on the table yet all they do is play games. Nakakapagod. Now that another prospective relationship is in the works, I can only hope that it will turn out to be pure and true. All I really want is to be loved.
The long wait is almost over. We are about to elect a new set of leaders that will shape the future of our country. I can only hope that people will vote for those "ought to be elected" and not those "most likely to be elected". Survey are supposed to follow us and not the other way around. For this election, I have decided to make the principled and intelligent choice. Noynoy is out simply because he has not earned anything for himself. He has not done anything of significance at all. If he wins, then we are so screwed and we can not even do anything about it because we can not impeach a president for incompetence. And are we not taught and brought up to be better than our parents? For this reason alone, I can not cast my vote for Noynoy, who has history of mental problems. Yes. I said it. Naniniwala ako sa report na kahit sabihin pa natin ay peke, walang duda sakin na may hindi normal kay Noynoy. Erap is not even a choice because he is simply embarrassing. He is a convicted plunderer yet he is allowed to run for the same office where he amassed his wealth. Grabe. Only in the Philippines. I have narrowed down my choices between Villar and Gibo. I thought I have decided on Gibo but after seeing Villar's hot seat interview on Bandila a few hours ago, it made me rethink my decision. I saw his experience, competence, and sincerity. I realized that a lot of the criticisms and black propaganda against him are rooted on crab mentality. Ang mga pinoy kasi pilit binababa ang mga taong naiangat ang sarili. So I would not mind if Villar wins the presidency. Imagine what he could do if succeeds in running the government like a private institution. Hello efficiency! Then ofcourse, there is Gibo. Gibo is simply stellar. If he becomes president, I would be so proud. I truly believe that he can unite this country. He has the ability to make people of different backgrounds, beliefs, and ideologies meet somewhere in the middle to arrive at a consensus. He is young and dynamic. He has good judgement and even-tempered. He knows the issues plaguing this country well. I may just cast my vote for him.
Too long is this blog now. I must end it right here.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Happy
I have been in s such a good mood lately. Stress does not get to me as much. Delicious food, fancy purchases, and uninterrupted exercise seems to be the perfect antidote to life's daily challenges. Well, there is also the blossoming love life.
Whatever. This post is non-sense. Hihihi! :P
Whatever. This post is non-sense. Hihihi! :P
Friday, April 2, 2010
A Not So Holy Week
I have never been one to strictly follow the demands of Holy Week. I seldom retreat in prayer. I do not fast. I rarely complete the 14 Stations of the Cross. Looking back on the more recent years of this religious holiday, I have spent it with friends either going out of town or hanging out in the metro. Boracay is a popular destination during Holy Week and I must say that it is quite the experience. I was there 3 Holy Weeks ago with friends and I spent it chilling on the beach with a mojito in hand in the afternoons while watching the sunset, then partying at night to the beat of house music until sunrise. Whenever I decide to stay in the Metro, I usually invade a friend's house and have a dvd marathon then invite other friends "stuck" in the metro for some classic drinking session.
Well this year I had the option to follow friends to Puerto Galera or stay here in the Metro and hang out with other friends. I decided on the latter. JC came over last night and joined a drinking session with my bro's friends. Today we plan on suprising Candy at her house for a night of food, drinks, and dvd's. We might just sleep over. And I just got an invite for a volleyball game in CSA on Black Saturday. Yay! I realized that Holy Week is really the only time I get to relax and unwind especially now that things are getting more difficult and hectic at work. I need time to breathe. It also just dawned on me that I have not been out of town for so long! And I swear, I have to go to the beach this summer! I'm thinking Boracay or Bohol. Or fine. I'll even consider Puerto Galera.
My dear blog club, I have just been informed that next weekend is a long weekend. How about a quick trip to the beach? I'm thinking Puerto Galera. It's close. It's cheap. It's fun. Let us goh!!! And also!!! Can we please save for a trip to Japan?!? Like late this year or early next year. C'mon!
I apologize to the Lord now if somehow my blog on Holy Week became a travel itinerary of sorts. But Dear God, I hope you know that I try my best to be a good Catholic. I may not be into the various rituals of the Church, but do know that deep down I am a good person whose morals are still intact. It may not look it, but trust me, they are.
Well this year I had the option to follow friends to Puerto Galera or stay here in the Metro and hang out with other friends. I decided on the latter. JC came over last night and joined a drinking session with my bro's friends. Today we plan on suprising Candy at her house for a night of food, drinks, and dvd's. We might just sleep over. And I just got an invite for a volleyball game in CSA on Black Saturday. Yay! I realized that Holy Week is really the only time I get to relax and unwind especially now that things are getting more difficult and hectic at work. I need time to breathe. It also just dawned on me that I have not been out of town for so long! And I swear, I have to go to the beach this summer! I'm thinking Boracay or Bohol. Or fine. I'll even consider Puerto Galera.
My dear blog club, I have just been informed that next weekend is a long weekend. How about a quick trip to the beach? I'm thinking Puerto Galera. It's close. It's cheap. It's fun. Let us goh!!! And also!!! Can we please save for a trip to Japan?!? Like late this year or early next year. C'mon!
I apologize to the Lord now if somehow my blog on Holy Week became a travel itinerary of sorts. But Dear God, I hope you know that I try my best to be a good Catholic. I may not be into the various rituals of the Church, but do know that deep down I am a good person whose morals are still intact. It may not look it, but trust me, they are.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Milestones
Last night, my core group of friends trooped to the Supreme Court to support Arianne while waiting for the results of the bar exams. She passed! She is now officially an attorney! We are so happy and so proud of her as it has been her dream to be a lawyer since we were like what - first grade? Yay!!! Everyone was sending their congratulations. All of our parents were so happy! Tita Carol, Candy's mom, even texted that it's nice to see all of us getting there. In 2 years, it will be Candy's turn as she takes the medical board exams. JC is now CEO of Tangerine, a sister company of EON, a public relations firm. And I am currently pursuing a career in development banking via an arduous management program. Tita Carol told us to celebrate by having a good dinner and ordered Candy to charge everything to her! I love it!!! We had a fantastic chinese dinner at Tai Yuan in Manila. This restaurant was feautured in the travel show, Our Awesome Planet! Peking duck galore!
We got senti a bit because we realized how we've grown up together. I shared the hope that we'll have more milestones like this in the future. Family, career, and love will surely bind us together and make our friendships stronger.
To my little blog club and to some extent, the circle, I hope we get there too. I hope we'll share more successes and be with each other in times of failure.
We got senti a bit because we realized how we've grown up together. I shared the hope that we'll have more milestones like this in the future. Family, career, and love will surely bind us together and make our friendships stronger.
To my little blog club and to some extent, the circle, I hope we get there too. I hope we'll share more successes and be with each other in times of failure.
Friday, March 26, 2010
An Important Lesson
Life is really unfair. You win some. You lose some. You will get frustrated in moments when you lose something that you feel in your heart you worked for very hard. You will argue your side and would feel better after releasing some of that bottled up emotion. But know this. The situation may still not go your way. Thus, the best thing to do is to walk away gracefully and decide to bounce back with a vengeance!
Such lesson is applicable to any facet of your life, most epecially in love and career.
Such lesson is applicable to any facet of your life, most epecially in love and career.
Life Path 3
I was born on June 29, 1984. Thus my life path number is 3. (6+29+1984=2019; 2+0+1+9=12; 1+2=3). Read on about what it says about people whose life path number is 3 just like me. Try it yourself and check it out here http://www.astrology-numerology.com/num-lifepath.html#lp3. Thanks to Nico for sharing this with me.
The Life Path 3 indicates that you entered this plane with a strong sense of creativity and with wonderful communication skills. Achievement for you most likely comes through engaging your ingenious expression. A truly gifted 3 possesses the most exceptional innovative skills, normally in the verbal realm, writing, speaking, acting, or similar endeavors. Here we are apt to find the entertainers of the world, bright, effervescent, sparkling people with very optimistic attitudes. The bright side of this path stresses harmony, beauty and pleasures; of sharing your inventive talents with the world. Capturing your capability in creative self-expression is the highest level of attainment for this life path.
Life is generally lived to the fullest, often without much worry about tomorrow. You are not very good at handling money because of a general lack of concern about it. You spend it when you have it and don't when you don't.
The 3 loves connecting with people. The characteristics of the 3 are warmth and friendliness, a good conversationalist, social and open. A good talker both from the standpoint of being a delight to listen to, but even more importantly, one who has the ability to listen to others. Accordingly, the life path 3 produces individuals who are always a welcome addition to any social situation and know how to make others feel at home. The approach to life tends to be exceedingly positive. Your disposition is almost surely sunny and openhearted. A happy and often inspired person, you are constantly seeking and needing the stimuli of similar people.
There is a remote side to your 3 Life Path, as well. This comes as a surprise to the native and to those who think they are well acquainted. The 3 is actually a very sensitive soul. When hurt, you can easily retreat to a shell of morose silence for extended periods. Nonetheless, the 3 eventually copes with all of the many setbacks that occur in life and readily bounces back for more. It is usually easy for you to deal with problems because you can freely admit the existence of problems without letting them get you down for too long. Because of your own sensitivity to hurt, you have a caring disposition and seem to be very conscious of other people's feelings and emotions.
In romance, the 3 is a very ardent and loyal lover. Affairs that don't go well can leave scares that seem to linger. Emotional experiences of all sorts tend to deeply touch the 3 and the drama may take some time to play out. Regrettably, the giving disposition of the 3 often attracts demanding partners. As with most of life's issues for the 3 Life Path, balance in relationships is illusive.
Your big test with a 3 Life Path is controlling your highs and lows. You won't survive very well in any routine environment or when you are placed under dominating management. Slow thinking and overly contemplative people tend to frustrate you, and you don't function too well with this type whether you are working for, with, or under them. Your exuberant nature can take you far, especially if you are ever able to focus your energies and talents.
For the few living on the negative side of this Life Path, a 3 may be so delighted with the joy of living that the life becomes frivolous and superficial. You may scatter your abilities and express little sense of purpose. The 3 can be an enigma, for no apparent reason you may become moody nd tend to retreat. Escapist tendencies are not uncommon with the 3 life path, and you find it very hard to settle into one place or one position. Guard against being critical of others, impatient, intolerant, or overly optimistic.
The Life Path 3 indicates that you entered this plane with a strong sense of creativity and with wonderful communication skills. Achievement for you most likely comes through engaging your ingenious expression. A truly gifted 3 possesses the most exceptional innovative skills, normally in the verbal realm, writing, speaking, acting, or similar endeavors. Here we are apt to find the entertainers of the world, bright, effervescent, sparkling people with very optimistic attitudes. The bright side of this path stresses harmony, beauty and pleasures; of sharing your inventive talents with the world. Capturing your capability in creative self-expression is the highest level of attainment for this life path.
Life is generally lived to the fullest, often without much worry about tomorrow. You are not very good at handling money because of a general lack of concern about it. You spend it when you have it and don't when you don't.
The 3 loves connecting with people. The characteristics of the 3 are warmth and friendliness, a good conversationalist, social and open. A good talker both from the standpoint of being a delight to listen to, but even more importantly, one who has the ability to listen to others. Accordingly, the life path 3 produces individuals who are always a welcome addition to any social situation and know how to make others feel at home. The approach to life tends to be exceedingly positive. Your disposition is almost surely sunny and openhearted. A happy and often inspired person, you are constantly seeking and needing the stimuli of similar people.
There is a remote side to your 3 Life Path, as well. This comes as a surprise to the native and to those who think they are well acquainted. The 3 is actually a very sensitive soul. When hurt, you can easily retreat to a shell of morose silence for extended periods. Nonetheless, the 3 eventually copes with all of the many setbacks that occur in life and readily bounces back for more. It is usually easy for you to deal with problems because you can freely admit the existence of problems without letting them get you down for too long. Because of your own sensitivity to hurt, you have a caring disposition and seem to be very conscious of other people's feelings and emotions.
In romance, the 3 is a very ardent and loyal lover. Affairs that don't go well can leave scares that seem to linger. Emotional experiences of all sorts tend to deeply touch the 3 and the drama may take some time to play out. Regrettably, the giving disposition of the 3 often attracts demanding partners. As with most of life's issues for the 3 Life Path, balance in relationships is illusive.
Your big test with a 3 Life Path is controlling your highs and lows. You won't survive very well in any routine environment or when you are placed under dominating management. Slow thinking and overly contemplative people tend to frustrate you, and you don't function too well with this type whether you are working for, with, or under them. Your exuberant nature can take you far, especially if you are ever able to focus your energies and talents.
For the few living on the negative side of this Life Path, a 3 may be so delighted with the joy of living that the life becomes frivolous and superficial. You may scatter your abilities and express little sense of purpose. The 3 can be an enigma, for no apparent reason you may become moody nd tend to retreat. Escapist tendencies are not uncommon with the 3 life path, and you find it very hard to settle into one place or one position. Guard against being critical of others, impatient, intolerant, or overly optimistic.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Time Heals All Wounds Indeed
It was not that long ago when I decided to stop apologizing. It has been almost a year and I thought that it would be better to just count my blessings. I have been ignored long enough and I was actually convincing myself that it is not that big of a deal anymore. I can always make more friends. Heck I don't even need more friends. I am fine with the people I have. There is no point in wasting my time with someone who clearly had moved on. So I decided to do the same.
But then, an unexpected text message late last night...
S: Hi. Sorry if ngayon lang ako nag text. I've been receiving your messages before. And I didn't want to be a hypocrite, so I didn't reply to your apologies. It's been almost a year now, and I just want you to know that I am not mad at you anymore ok? Honestly, I want to trust you again, but I will need time. It will never be like before. Let's face that. But I'm not mad anymore. I'll see you around. Have a great evening.
I was driving and my jaw literally dropped upon reading this message. I did not think that he would finally take the step to start talking again. We were good friends. At one point, I considered him one of my best friends. The reason or reasons for our falling out is a long story that I do not wish to revisit. But here it is - the opportunity I waited for to finally be able to reconnect with my once good friend. So I replied...
M: I understand and I appreciate you touching base. I really missed you. I also recognize that it will not be the same but hopefully time will help make things the way they were again. Take care.
S: With all sincerity...I hope so too.
I have no delusions that everything will be ok. But this is a good first step. Time can heal and I hope it will do it fast. I miss this friend of mine that much.
But then, an unexpected text message late last night...
S: Hi. Sorry if ngayon lang ako nag text. I've been receiving your messages before. And I didn't want to be a hypocrite, so I didn't reply to your apologies. It's been almost a year now, and I just want you to know that I am not mad at you anymore ok? Honestly, I want to trust you again, but I will need time. It will never be like before. Let's face that. But I'm not mad anymore. I'll see you around. Have a great evening.
I was driving and my jaw literally dropped upon reading this message. I did not think that he would finally take the step to start talking again. We were good friends. At one point, I considered him one of my best friends. The reason or reasons for our falling out is a long story that I do not wish to revisit. But here it is - the opportunity I waited for to finally be able to reconnect with my once good friend. So I replied...
M: I understand and I appreciate you touching base. I really missed you. I also recognize that it will not be the same but hopefully time will help make things the way they were again. Take care.
S: With all sincerity...I hope so too.
I have no delusions that everything will be ok. But this is a good first step. Time can heal and I hope it will do it fast. I miss this friend of mine that much.
Sunday, March 14, 2010
The Real Deal
Not a few people have told me that I can be intimidating. Not a few people have also told me that I have very high standards. I guess it is a logical explanation as to why I am still single. I can not blame people for thinking that. I can understand how I may come off too strong for some people.
But here's the thing. If people find me intimidating, then it's their problem. Sometimes you have to build walls in order to know who has the courage to break through them. If people think I have very high standards, then I guess they have serious insecurity issues.
Some of my friends may flinch at this but I am actually shy. Really. Leave me all alone at a social function then I would most likely be a wallflower. I hate small talk. I rarely start conversations with strangers. And I am usually awkward around new people. If people think otherwise, then I guess they have failed to see through my tough exterior. And if so, then I guess they are not worth meeting; much more worth dating. Only a few people have managed to break through the walls I have unconsciously created. Fortunately, they are the ones with whom I have developed special bonds - friends for life, relationships (official or unofficial) I won't forget, and a soul mate.
To be honest, I really do not think I have that too high a standard. Please. I am not
looking for perfection. How can I when I know I myself am not perfect? I am just looking for someone decent-looking, can carry a good conversation, and open to new experiences as I am. Is that too hard? Seriously. I have always wondered where this notion of me having very high standards emanated from. Is it because I love dining out and travelling? That can be but I don't expect to be always doing that with people I date. I can be just as happy in a fast food joint as I would be in a posh restaurant. I can just be as comfortable in an MRT as I would be in a boeing 747. My examples may be shallow but the point is that I can be flexible.
I guess what I am trying to say is, I am who I am. It is easier to judge me from how I appear. But it is more rewarding to go beyond that.
But here's the thing. If people find me intimidating, then it's their problem. Sometimes you have to build walls in order to know who has the courage to break through them. If people think I have very high standards, then I guess they have serious insecurity issues.
Some of my friends may flinch at this but I am actually shy. Really. Leave me all alone at a social function then I would most likely be a wallflower. I hate small talk. I rarely start conversations with strangers. And I am usually awkward around new people. If people think otherwise, then I guess they have failed to see through my tough exterior. And if so, then I guess they are not worth meeting; much more worth dating. Only a few people have managed to break through the walls I have unconsciously created. Fortunately, they are the ones with whom I have developed special bonds - friends for life, relationships (official or unofficial) I won't forget, and a soul mate.
To be honest, I really do not think I have that too high a standard. Please. I am not
looking for perfection. How can I when I know I myself am not perfect? I am just looking for someone decent-looking, can carry a good conversation, and open to new experiences as I am. Is that too hard? Seriously. I have always wondered where this notion of me having very high standards emanated from. Is it because I love dining out and travelling? That can be but I don't expect to be always doing that with people I date. I can be just as happy in a fast food joint as I would be in a posh restaurant. I can just be as comfortable in an MRT as I would be in a boeing 747. My examples may be shallow but the point is that I can be flexible.
I guess what I am trying to say is, I am who I am. It is easier to judge me from how I appear. But it is more rewarding to go beyond that.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Unexpected
It feels so good to receive an unexpected call from someone you care about. Kilig! Yun lang! Hahaha!
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Moving In and Moving On
I spent the night at our new home for the first time last night. It is the new home that represents my family's new life without the painful baggage of my good-for-nothing father. So much has happened in the past 3 years. A lot of it was drama only fit for a primetime teleserye. I remember thinking how insane it was that something I can only watch on television can actually happen in real life. Grabe! I thought things like that can not possibly ever happen to people like me and my family. It was just wrong. I mean it was just like life immitating art - or is it the other way around?
I am very happy that finally that chapter is closed. We are moving on. Still, I was surprised to have a moment last night where I felt sympathy for my estranged father. Imagine waking up one morning and your family is gone. Does he feel remorse? Does he feel regret? Does he finally understand the error of his ways? The answers to such questions will remain a mystery for now. I choose to move forward and never look back. After all, it is still my world. I decide how it looks like from my perspective. And the view looks good.
I am very happy that finally that chapter is closed. We are moving on. Still, I was surprised to have a moment last night where I felt sympathy for my estranged father. Imagine waking up one morning and your family is gone. Does he feel remorse? Does he feel regret? Does he finally understand the error of his ways? The answers to such questions will remain a mystery for now. I choose to move forward and never look back. After all, it is still my world. I decide how it looks like from my perspective. And the view looks good.
Saturday, March 6, 2010
N and I are Just Friends
I had dinner with N at my favorite restaurant in Serendra, Balducci. We shared the Gamberri, Greca, and Rib Eye Steak. Needless to say, the food was delectable. I was super satisfied. The red wine paired with the steak provided that extra bite. But this entry is not a food review.
N and I still have that chemistry we had when we were still dating. We are alike in so many ways. Conversations were still on point. We made each other laugh, stimulated each other's intellect, and gave each other smiles in moments of silence. But it was the first time that I actually thought that we will just be friends. I guess we differ on the things that matter most.
N and I still have that chemistry we had when we were still dating. We are alike in so many ways. Conversations were still on point. We made each other laugh, stimulated each other's intellect, and gave each other smiles in moments of silence. But it was the first time that I actually thought that we will just be friends. I guess we differ on the things that matter most.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Pilipinas Kong Mahal
Ako'y naaawa sa kasalukuyang lagay ng aking bansa. Dahil sa El Niño, malapit nang matuyo ang mga dam na nagbibigay ng kuryente sa maraming probinsya. Dahil sa El Niño, ang mga irigasyon ay hindi na gumagana. Dahil sa El Niño, ang mga tanim ng ating mga magsasaka ay nasasayang. Ang kondisyon ng panahon ay nagbabantang makasira sa takbo ng ekonomiya. Nararanasan na sa Metro Manila ang mga "rotating brownout" na siya namang nakakaapekto sa takbo ng negosyo. Laganap na din ang sakit dulot ng sobrang kainitan.
Sa lahat ng ito, ang pinaka apektado ay ang ating mga mahirap na kababayan. Nakakalungkot. Mas nakakalungkot ay tila ang kawalan ng aksyon mula sa ating mga hinalal na opisyal ng bayan na tungkulin ay maglingkod. Sila ay abala sa pamumulitika. Hindi naman ito kagulat gulat. Dahil kung sa bagay, bihirang makarinig ng mga kongkretong plano at posisyon ukol sa mga importanteng isyu ng bansa. Sino na ba ang nakapagbigay ng malinaw na posisyon sa reproductive health bill? Sino na bang nagbigay ng suhestiyon sa lumalalang kakulangan sa pagkain? Sino na bang nagbigay ng solusyon sa krisis sa kuryente at tubig? Iba ang pinagkakaabalahan ng ating mga pulitiko. Puro pasikat, papogi, at pahirap ang inaatupag. Mga hangal!
Diyos ko, sana ay magpaulan kayo ng grasya sa Pilipinas kong mahal.
Sa lahat ng ito, ang pinaka apektado ay ang ating mga mahirap na kababayan. Nakakalungkot. Mas nakakalungkot ay tila ang kawalan ng aksyon mula sa ating mga hinalal na opisyal ng bayan na tungkulin ay maglingkod. Sila ay abala sa pamumulitika. Hindi naman ito kagulat gulat. Dahil kung sa bagay, bihirang makarinig ng mga kongkretong plano at posisyon ukol sa mga importanteng isyu ng bansa. Sino na ba ang nakapagbigay ng malinaw na posisyon sa reproductive health bill? Sino na bang nagbigay ng suhestiyon sa lumalalang kakulangan sa pagkain? Sino na bang nagbigay ng solusyon sa krisis sa kuryente at tubig? Iba ang pinagkakaabalahan ng ating mga pulitiko. Puro pasikat, papogi, at pahirap ang inaatupag. Mga hangal!
Diyos ko, sana ay magpaulan kayo ng grasya sa Pilipinas kong mahal.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Dear Drew
Dear Drew,
First of all, this letter is long but bare with me because I wrote it and I am supposed to be one of your best friends damn it! Hehe. How have you been? I see you're starting to settle in your new apartment. That's great! Although I'll certainly miss Naturalville. No more vacation house in Bangkok for me.
My family (meaning me, my brother, and my mom) are also in a period of transition. You know how we've been selling our house for like 3 years already but negotiations have never really reached the final stages. It came to the point na sobrang frustrating na. The house, if you remember, is the only thing left that's preventing us from completely severing our ties with my mom's husband on paper (I refuse to call him dad or my mom's spouse. Hehe.) Meanwhile, the condominium that my siblings and I own in Roxas Boulevard has been in the market for a year. We wanted to have it rented for extra income.
But recently, our house recently got sold! So yay! Finally, my mom can start a new life and my brother and I are only willing to support her. So happiness diba! We were able to sign the deed of sale the other day so it's official. We planned to live in our condo in Roxas Boulevard temporarily but here's another good news - the condo too recently got rented to a Korean! I never thought I'd say this, but homaygod! Apart from their cuisine, I can say that I love Korean people na ren! Hahaha! So double yay! I can't believe that everything will happen in a span of a month. We waited for 3 years and now it's here. Nakakaloka!
Pero alam mo ba ang mas nakakaloka? We have a week to vacate our house and we still have no place to move in to! Hahaha! Mom was on panic mode but I assured her that it is a happy problem and that she should relax. Kakatawa kasi. And yun nga, just yesterday, she bought na a new house. Hahaha! It is not far away from our current house where I grew up. We will move in next week in Teoville East. It is smaller ofcourse but just right for me, my brother, and my mom. I am excited and anxious at the same time kasi sa totoo lang, hindi ko pa nakikita ung bahay. My mom just texted me about her impulse buying. She said she and my brother liked it and knowing my brother's discriminating taste, I am a bit sure that maganda nga ung bahay. Plus my sister and her family will be coming home this May to celebrate my mom's 60th in June. So I will see my nieces! Yay again! Everything in the family front seems to be looking up. Finally.
Meanwhile, work is going well. I am still surviving. Unfortunately, I have batchmates in the management program that have been let go. They did not make it. It is getting more tough but I have decided to not just survive the program, but come out on top of it! The secret is that I am applying the secret.
Friendships are blooming. (Hahaha! Parang nagdadalaga!) JC has become so senti recently. He asked assurance about the strength and stability of our friendship just the other day. So syempre natawa naman ako kasi never naman siya nagmoment ng ganyan sakin ng hindi lasing! Hahaha! Arianne will be looking forward to a lot of things - more than she knows for now. Bar results will come out soon and ofcourse we will be there for her no what happens. Candy is still Candy. Baklang babae pa ren. Her relationship with John is going strong and she is having fun in medical school. Jem and I go out once in a while. We share a love for volleyball so we have been watching the UAAP games every now and then live. Miguel and I are watching Binibining Pilipinas live at Araneta on March 6. I have also made new friends at work so everything is going well. Carla is like my female half - loud, dramatic, and totally out there. But she is also very smart, frank, and caring - just like me! You would love her I am sure. Allan is a weirdo and we kinda like the way he is for some reason. He likes art and literature. He is a total geek but in a cool kind of way - at least for us. I am not so sure about the rest of society's thoughts. Meanwhile, Simoun and I saw each other for the first time in like a year siguro about 2 weeks ago in Bed, when Chuck was here for a visit. Dedma. It kinda hurt kasi first time kong nakitang super indifferent siya. I thought he still hated me which I would prefer but I guess wala na talaga. And I have decided na stop na ren ako. There is a limit diba? And I have ran out of apologies. Best to just count my blessings which are more abundant that those things I don not have. So as Jem said, steady na muna. 'Wag nang paapekto", which can be naman.
Meanwhile, the only thing missing here is YOU. I miss you Drew! I hope you are well. I hope life is treating you right. We will see each other soon.
Moks
P.S.
Ofcourse, life can not be that perfect so needless to say, my love life is still wanting. I date and I go out. My friends occassionally set me up and I go. But it is all good. I date for leisure. It is a temporary distraction from the stress that is life. It is not something that is a must at this point. (Hahahaha! You know that's a lie right?)
First of all, this letter is long but bare with me because I wrote it and I am supposed to be one of your best friends damn it! Hehe. How have you been? I see you're starting to settle in your new apartment. That's great! Although I'll certainly miss Naturalville. No more vacation house in Bangkok for me.
My family (meaning me, my brother, and my mom) are also in a period of transition. You know how we've been selling our house for like 3 years already but negotiations have never really reached the final stages. It came to the point na sobrang frustrating na. The house, if you remember, is the only thing left that's preventing us from completely severing our ties with my mom's husband on paper (I refuse to call him dad or my mom's spouse. Hehe.) Meanwhile, the condominium that my siblings and I own in Roxas Boulevard has been in the market for a year. We wanted to have it rented for extra income.
But recently, our house recently got sold! So yay! Finally, my mom can start a new life and my brother and I are only willing to support her. So happiness diba! We were able to sign the deed of sale the other day so it's official. We planned to live in our condo in Roxas Boulevard temporarily but here's another good news - the condo too recently got rented to a Korean! I never thought I'd say this, but homaygod! Apart from their cuisine, I can say that I love Korean people na ren! Hahaha! So double yay! I can't believe that everything will happen in a span of a month. We waited for 3 years and now it's here. Nakakaloka!
Pero alam mo ba ang mas nakakaloka? We have a week to vacate our house and we still have no place to move in to! Hahaha! Mom was on panic mode but I assured her that it is a happy problem and that she should relax. Kakatawa kasi. And yun nga, just yesterday, she bought na a new house. Hahaha! It is not far away from our current house where I grew up. We will move in next week in Teoville East. It is smaller ofcourse but just right for me, my brother, and my mom. I am excited and anxious at the same time kasi sa totoo lang, hindi ko pa nakikita ung bahay. My mom just texted me about her impulse buying. She said she and my brother liked it and knowing my brother's discriminating taste, I am a bit sure that maganda nga ung bahay. Plus my sister and her family will be coming home this May to celebrate my mom's 60th in June. So I will see my nieces! Yay again! Everything in the family front seems to be looking up. Finally.
Meanwhile, work is going well. I am still surviving. Unfortunately, I have batchmates in the management program that have been let go. They did not make it. It is getting more tough but I have decided to not just survive the program, but come out on top of it! The secret is that I am applying the secret.
Friendships are blooming. (Hahaha! Parang nagdadalaga!) JC has become so senti recently. He asked assurance about the strength and stability of our friendship just the other day. So syempre natawa naman ako kasi never naman siya nagmoment ng ganyan sakin ng hindi lasing! Hahaha! Arianne will be looking forward to a lot of things - more than she knows for now. Bar results will come out soon and ofcourse we will be there for her no what happens. Candy is still Candy. Baklang babae pa ren. Her relationship with John is going strong and she is having fun in medical school. Jem and I go out once in a while. We share a love for volleyball so we have been watching the UAAP games every now and then live. Miguel and I are watching Binibining Pilipinas live at Araneta on March 6. I have also made new friends at work so everything is going well. Carla is like my female half - loud, dramatic, and totally out there. But she is also very smart, frank, and caring - just like me! You would love her I am sure. Allan is a weirdo and we kinda like the way he is for some reason. He likes art and literature. He is a total geek but in a cool kind of way - at least for us. I am not so sure about the rest of society's thoughts. Meanwhile, Simoun and I saw each other for the first time in like a year siguro about 2 weeks ago in Bed, when Chuck was here for a visit. Dedma. It kinda hurt kasi first time kong nakitang super indifferent siya. I thought he still hated me which I would prefer but I guess wala na talaga. And I have decided na stop na ren ako. There is a limit diba? And I have ran out of apologies. Best to just count my blessings which are more abundant that those things I don not have. So as Jem said, steady na muna. 'Wag nang paapekto", which can be naman.
Meanwhile, the only thing missing here is YOU. I miss you Drew! I hope you are well. I hope life is treating you right. We will see each other soon.
Moks
P.S.
Ofcourse, life can not be that perfect so needless to say, my love life is still wanting. I date and I go out. My friends occassionally set me up and I go. But it is all good. I date for leisure. It is a temporary distraction from the stress that is life. It is not something that is a must at this point. (Hahahaha! You know that's a lie right?)
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Body Beautiful
I have always hated my tummy area. It's not bulging like a middle aged man with a beer belly or anything but it has bits of flab which are just totally unacceptable. (Eeewst. Did I broadcast that on the internet?!)Yes, I can be vain and conscious of my body. I do not have a good body image. Tyra would give me a scolding. But whatever. The point is earlier tonight I was at the gym and I saw a guy with the body that I want to have for myself. He was lean and toned, but not ripped. It was just right. His stomach area was just flat with seemingly no ounce of fat. I hated him.
I swear! It's so freakin' hard to trim down. I have been doing yoga, cycling, body combat, all the cardio machines at the gym, and some strength training yet I do not seem to have trimmed down at all. I try to go to the gym at least 3 times a week. I have lessened my food intake. I do not understand why I can not just have a flatter stomach. I am not even going for a freakin' six-pack - just a toned mid section damn it! I promised myself that if I still do not have the body that I want by the time I'm 30, I shall make an appointment with Zunic or Marie France for Men (Free plugging na'to!). I bet the money I would spend there for results in like days would be way cheaper than the monthly gym membership and the personal training sessions I had at Fitness First for years.
In the meantime, whenever I feel lazy to exercise, all I need to do is think of that guy I saw at the gym earlier. I shall have the body I want - lean and toned. This is soooo it!!!
I swear! It's so freakin' hard to trim down. I have been doing yoga, cycling, body combat, all the cardio machines at the gym, and some strength training yet I do not seem to have trimmed down at all. I try to go to the gym at least 3 times a week. I have lessened my food intake. I do not understand why I can not just have a flatter stomach. I am not even going for a freakin' six-pack - just a toned mid section damn it! I promised myself that if I still do not have the body that I want by the time I'm 30, I shall make an appointment with Zunic or Marie France for Men (Free plugging na'to!). I bet the money I would spend there for results in like days would be way cheaper than the monthly gym membership and the personal training sessions I had at Fitness First for years.
In the meantime, whenever I feel lazy to exercise, all I need to do is think of that guy I saw at the gym earlier. I shall have the body I want - lean and toned. This is soooo it!!!
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Doctor: Out, Lawyer: In
It did not work out with the doctor. It fizzled out. Fortunately I met someone else more interesting. I met the lawyer last night at the club. It started getting hot and flirty, but I took control and stopped myself. I thought of trying something different this time. It is actually not different because I have had this policy for so long. It is just that I have been violating it a lot recently.
We shall see how it goes. I have a good feeling about this.
Do not have sex with someone you see a potential for a serious relationship with right away.
We shall see how it goes. I have a good feeling about this.
Time to Stop Feeling Guilty
It is the first time in a year that I saw him - my very close friend whom I had a falling out it with because of something I did for love. I fought for it. I lost. And the cost was a friendship that took years to build and just one day to destroy. Lessons were learned. I dealt with it and tried to move on a better person.
Still, I imagined that moment when we will cross paths and hopefully exchange some words. I have been wanting to talk to him for so long and eventhough I knew that he will just ignore me, I still wanted him to know that I still consider him important to me and that I still want to be his friend. Last night it happened. It was totally unexpected. However, the circumstances were less than ideal for a chat or even an acknowledgement of each other's presence. But we both knew we saw each other.
I left thinking about what might have happened if I had simply approached and said hi. I thought about the possibilities. He would most likely ignore me and I would look stupid in front of our friends. I decided to text him eventhough I knew I would not get a reply.
As expected, I did not get a reply. That is water under the bridge now and after today I realized that he really does not care anymore, which breaks my heart. I would rather that he hates me than feel indifferent towards me. So I have decided to stop feeling guilty after all this time. My apologies have been exhausted. Maybe later in life we would eventually talk. But I must resign myself to the possibility that it may not happen at all. Life indeed is just about causes and effects; choices and repercussions. One must just learn to live with them - good or bad.
Still, I imagined that moment when we will cross paths and hopefully exchange some words. I have been wanting to talk to him for so long and eventhough I knew that he will just ignore me, I still wanted him to know that I still consider him important to me and that I still want to be his friend. Last night it happened. It was totally unexpected. However, the circumstances were less than ideal for a chat or even an acknowledgement of each other's presence. But we both knew we saw each other.
I left thinking about what might have happened if I had simply approached and said hi. I thought about the possibilities. He would most likely ignore me and I would look stupid in front of our friends. I decided to text him eventhough I knew I would not get a reply.
"You probably won't reply but hopefully I'll be suprised. Inspite us not making pansin each other it was still nice seeing you. I know the feeling may not be mutual but still. Hope we can start talking again. I'm sorry for everything. Sorry. For everything. Take care."
As expected, I did not get a reply. That is water under the bridge now and after today I realized that he really does not care anymore, which breaks my heart. I would rather that he hates me than feel indifferent towards me. So I have decided to stop feeling guilty after all this time. My apologies have been exhausted. Maybe later in life we would eventually talk. But I must resign myself to the possibility that it may not happen at all. Life indeed is just about causes and effects; choices and repercussions. One must just learn to live with them - good or bad.
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Shopping Habits
I have been on a cost cutting binge lately because of what the general public would like to refer to as the "real world." This real world for me meant monthly bills to pay, credit card bills to settle, and finding cheaper thrills to enjoy. If you ask me, it's no world that I would want to be living in. Hehe. But be that as it may, this new lifestyle I'm trying to adapt to has developed a new shopping habit which I kind of enjoy.
I would try on some dress shirts I like and check if I still fit in a size small. Semi-superficial yes I know but then again I am also on an exercise binge because I still have not gotten off the weight I gained from the holidays. Plus, beach season is coming up and fatness on the white sandy beaches just can not be. Thus, I have adopted a policy of only buying sized small dress shirts - no matter how good they look. In addition, trying on stuff at the stores makes me feel like I am actually shopping eventhough I did not really buy anything. Although I must confess that I did cheat a couple of times and bought some nice tops and dress shirts. My excuse is that they are actually needed for work. Ok, maybe not the shirts I bought but the dress shirts were!
So tonight's report: Celio's sized small dress shirt no longer fit perfectly. I can no longer button the one around my neck! Crap!!! But, Springfield's size small ones still fit perfectly. So yay!!! :)
I would try on some dress shirts I like and check if I still fit in a size small. Semi-superficial yes I know but then again I am also on an exercise binge because I still have not gotten off the weight I gained from the holidays. Plus, beach season is coming up and fatness on the white sandy beaches just can not be. Thus, I have adopted a policy of only buying sized small dress shirts - no matter how good they look. In addition, trying on stuff at the stores makes me feel like I am actually shopping eventhough I did not really buy anything. Although I must confess that I did cheat a couple of times and bought some nice tops and dress shirts. My excuse is that they are actually needed for work. Ok, maybe not the shirts I bought but the dress shirts were!
So tonight's report: Celio's sized small dress shirt no longer fit perfectly. I can no longer button the one around my neck! Crap!!! But, Springfield's size small ones still fit perfectly. So yay!!! :)
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Moody Much?
Patience is not one of my virtues. But through the years I have learned to manage my emotions. I have not exactly mastered it since lately it has been easy for me to feel so agitated. I am hyper and flying high one minute and totally annoyed and irritated the next. What is worse is that it is the shallowest of things that get to me. I usually feel better after having some alone time at the gym or coffee bean - like where I am now.
I blame the stress I get from work. Moreover, I blame some people at work - those fault-finding, narrow-minded, drama-chasing crabs! Can they disappear like right now? I thought Baguio taught us to be happy for one another's success. Ater all, we are on the same team trying to survive a rigorous program. It is not as if our grades would affect yours. There is no real ranking system where the topnotcher would be declared valedictorian. What is this - high school? This is work. You guys bitching about how undeserved you think our grades are will not make your own grades any higher. And you guys do not have the authority to decide what grades people deserve. We all are on the same level. Well actually after this incident I believe you now are beneath us. Deal with it.
Thank God I have friends who truly are supportive. They are the ones who matter more. As for the others, I think a professional relationship is more than enough.
(Chants "I am positive and I am one with the universe. Negative energy be gone.")
I blame the stress I get from work. Moreover, I blame some people at work - those fault-finding, narrow-minded, drama-chasing crabs! Can they disappear like right now? I thought Baguio taught us to be happy for one another's success. Ater all, we are on the same team trying to survive a rigorous program. It is not as if our grades would affect yours. There is no real ranking system where the topnotcher would be declared valedictorian. What is this - high school? This is work. You guys bitching about how undeserved you think our grades are will not make your own grades any higher. And you guys do not have the authority to decide what grades people deserve. We all are on the same level. Well actually after this incident I believe you now are beneath us. Deal with it.
Thank God I have friends who truly are supportive. They are the ones who matter more. As for the others, I think a professional relationship is more than enough.
(Chants "I am positive and I am one with the universe. Negative energy be gone.")
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
First Entry
I have finally signed up for a blog account after deciding to do so for so long. I have envisioned this blog to b a space where I can express myself freely without judgement. I plan to write about what I think and feel about almost anything. Some posts may be hard-hitting as a I express my views on the relevant issues of the day or simply rambling and emotional as I pour my heart out on events that may have moved me on that day. I do not expect this blog to be read by thousands and I am actually ok with it. After all, this is my online journal and I put it up primarily for me. But in the event that someone here in cyberspace happened to pass by my tiny little space and my writing somehow stirred something in that person to leave a comment, I would surely appreciate it. :)
So what should I write about for my first entry? I guess it makes sense that I elaborate on this blog’s title - “wealth. power. love.” As a firm believer in The Secret, I figured that if I write these three words on a lot of my personal display screens, i.e. laptop wallpaper, mobile phone display, etc., that somehow I would have them. Wealth may not only pertain to the financial aspect, though I shall not be a hypocrite and say that I could live without it. :) It mostly pertains to wealth of experience of which I plan to have plenty. I would say that I am spontaneous, fun-loving, and adventurous. But also, I know how and when to get serious especially when it comes to my future. I am ambitious, goal-oriented, and I can get competitive. :) Power for me is being in a position to effect positive change by tapping on the strengths of others. I hope to have that power. But charisma is something that I can not say I have. Finally, there is love. It seems to be the most elusive thing to achieve. I shall not elaborate. :) But hopefully, God-willing, I would find that person who is most deserving of the amount of love I can give. :)
I guess I shall end this first entry right here. No worries though as I will surely be posting more in the coming days and weeks. Election fever is starting to build up and my love life has been like a rollercoaster so expect something thought-provoking or just plain annoying soon. ;)
So what should I write about for my first entry? I guess it makes sense that I elaborate on this blog’s title - “wealth. power. love.” As a firm believer in The Secret, I figured that if I write these three words on a lot of my personal display screens, i.e. laptop wallpaper, mobile phone display, etc., that somehow I would have them. Wealth may not only pertain to the financial aspect, though I shall not be a hypocrite and say that I could live without it. :) It mostly pertains to wealth of experience of which I plan to have plenty. I would say that I am spontaneous, fun-loving, and adventurous. But also, I know how and when to get serious especially when it comes to my future. I am ambitious, goal-oriented, and I can get competitive. :) Power for me is being in a position to effect positive change by tapping on the strengths of others. I hope to have that power. But charisma is something that I can not say I have. Finally, there is love. It seems to be the most elusive thing to achieve. I shall not elaborate. :) But hopefully, God-willing, I would find that person who is most deserving of the amount of love I can give. :)
I guess I shall end this first entry right here. No worries though as I will surely be posting more in the coming days and weeks. Election fever is starting to build up and my love life has been like a rollercoaster so expect something thought-provoking or just plain annoying soon. ;)
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